Living With Me And My OCD - GLEE STYLE
by Heyaarmy1
Summary: This story is based on OCD! I just want to get OCD out there so what better way than with glee? The OCD comes from my own personal life. However all the characters and relationships are Glee based. Basically Brittany has OCD this story is a journey of her and her girlfriend Santana dealing with the challenges life throws their way.
1. Chapter 1

Hi my names Brittany. I'm 16 and go to WMHS. My best friends Santana and Quinn know most things about me apart from one. I have OCD. I know what your thinking 'oh she's one of those people who are obsessed with cleaning up' NO! You're wrong. Everyone has this stereotypical view that people who suffer from OCD are all obsessed with cleaning and that's all this condition does, to be fair before I was diagnosed with it I thought that to. They're actually many different types of OCD, each kind brings with it different compulsions which must be carried out or else the people with the condition think bad things are going to happen. I don't have the cleaning OCD. My OCD is actually called Completely Obsessive OCD - basically all my compulsions are mental (in my head). OCD is a anxiety disorder so when you get stressed or nervous about something your OCD kicks of and you carry out your compulsions. Many people with this condition always use 'what if this happens' this causes your thoughts to become realistic and scare you more.

I want to tell you about my OCD before I tell you about when I told my two best friends. Well really Santana's my girlfriend and best friend. She's super amazing, cute and so talented I'm lucky to have her. Anyway I'll get back to my point. My OCD is basically I'm obsessed with death and anything that may cause death. The funny thing is death is also my worst fear. So I feel compelled to think about the one thing I fear most. It's strange I know. I found it quite hard to wrap my head around and also thought it's really unfair. Anything that may cause death such as illness, accidents ... . I have certain words I'm terrified of because in my head they mean death and that's all I can see them as. Many of you will probably think what this girl's mad but they're many other people just like me out there. As I'm so scared of the words I can't write them down but I'll tell you the first letter of the words. The first begins with a S and the second begins with a C. Aswell as all those things OCD affects your belief, confidence and brings you lots of self doubt.

I know I'm only at the beginning of my journey and it's never going to be perfect but sometimes I do wish I didn't have this condition. Anyway I'll tell you about when I told Santana first.

**Flash back**

We'd just came back from a date, we'd been to ice skating ring and had such a great time. Santana's good at many things but ice skating's is not one of them. I don't know how many times she nearly fell, each time she'd cling onto me tighter and let out a little scream. I mean you can't not love her. After our lovely romantic fun date we decided to head back to her house and watch a film. We were walking hand and hand back to her house when we passed a bus bench the bench had an advert on it ( Give $2 a month to help support C research) I stared freaking out in my head. I really wanted to run and hide but I was on a date with my amazing girlfriend who has no idea about my condition as always I was caught up in my head and had forgotten about Santana being next to me despite her hand being attached to mine. Santana can read me like a book so I knew by the worried expression on her face she knew something was wrong. "Babe what's wrong?" she asked me, razing her eyebrow while she squeezed my hand. "Whatever it is you can tell me." Santana said looking me directly in the eyes. I could see her chocolate brown eyes were filled with worry. I squeezed her hand back and took a breath.

"San there's something I've never told you." I began, closing my eyes and taking another deep breath to try calm me down. "To be fair I didn't find out till a couple of months ago but I've been to scared to tell you in-case you think I'm weired and don't want to be with me." I rapidly said, squeezing my eyes tighter. I was too scared to look at my girlfriends face in-case she was freaked out. I suddenly felt her lips on my.

After a reassuring kiss she whispered " I love you no matter what sweetie. Anything thrown our way we'll work with and get over it no matter how long it takes. You'll never be alone because your stuck with me and I love you." After that I slowly opened my eyes and kissed her quickly whispering thank you against her lips.

"San if I'm going to tell you I'd rather wait until we're in your house." I admitted. She nodded and gave my hand another reassuring squeeze before she snuggled into my side and wrapped her arms around my waist. In return I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and we began walking once again. We walked in a comfortable silence back to Santana's house. Once we were there San wasted no time pulling me inside and up to her bed room. Hand in hand we walked over and took a seat on her bed. My hands began playing with hers as my nerves began setting in. All my insecurities and the what ifs began. Santana leaned forward and kissed my check before giving me her famous Brittany smile.

"When ever you're ready babe." she said , softy. I nodded and slowly began explain everything to her. After a long emotional talk with lots of tears from both me and my girlfriend we were cuddled up on her bed watching Lier Lier. "Britt." San began. I looked over at her. " I'm so glad you told me. I know how hard this is going to be babe but I promise we'll get though it together. I'll be with you every step of the way, all the ups and downs - it's your road to recovery and I'm sharing your experience." Santana said before kissing my check.

"San I can't believe how amazing you took all that. I thought if I told you all this then you'd run for the hills or ask to have me locked up." I said with a wobble in my voice trying to fight back yet more tears. Santana grabbed my hand and shook her head. She clasped our hands together and kissed them.

"Britt why would I give up the best thing that's ever been mine because she has a mental illness/ In fact not even an illness a condition that's not her fault. I wouldn't because I see nothing wrong with someone having OCD it doesn't make you a freak or mentally unstable it just means you're balance in your brain isn't completely even." Santana stated, before stopping for a breath. " Babe you can get medication for it and it will help fix the imbalance in your brain." Santana added before kissing me.

After our little make out session I decided to ask her something that I'd been really curious about. "San how do you know so much about OCD?" I asked, she smiled and cuddled into me further.

"Babe I forgot to tell you my older cousin has OCD except his is a different type from yours. He's been getting treatment for it as well as medication and he's about 70percent better." Santana stated. I couldn't believe what I'd heard. My girlfriend knows about OCD, she doesn't think I'm weird and she still loves me. I kissed her before we decided to call it a night and head to bed. We exchanged some light conversation and a few kisses before we fell asleep in each others arms.

**Present**

Now my girls totally amazing and I'm so lucky to have her but many other who have OCD feel like they can't tell people because they'll be judged and labeled a freak. They also worry they'll never end up in a relationship either. I'm so glad I told Santana and I'm glad she's so supportive and is going to be with me every step of the way. Like I said this is only the beginning of my journey and I'd like to share it with you all. I'd like to give you an in site to the mind of someone with OCD and all the challenges we face. All our hopes and dreams to. I haven't actually told Quinn yet but I'll tell her soon. I need to let you know how it goes. Anyway Santana and me are going on another date so I gotta go. This has been Brittany S Peirce with this new chapter in my life. I'll see you again soon !


	2. NOTE

**Guys I'm so sorry about not undating in ages. I've had a lot going on in my life. OCD has kinda tooken over but I'm back. Just want you all to know you can expect some new chapters pretty soon :D**


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